I Guess I’m Not Grown Up Enough Yet For Fancy Shoes

I have finicky feet.  I have discovered over the years that the higher priced the shoe, the happier my feet are.  Which is rather unfortunate for the budget.  For years I was a Nine West girl, although lately their styles have been letting me down.  Or perhaps I have been letting them down.  In other words, I think I’m getting old.

I generally do okay shopping for shoes in what I like to call the budget section of Nordstrom (yes, there is a lower-priced section at Nordstrom) but there is one style of shoe that constantly eludes me.  That is the pump.  (Which is why I live in sandals and flip flops in the summer and boots in the winter.)

The pump hasn’t been as visible in recent years so I haven’t had to deal with it, but lately it seems to be making a comeback and I do like a pretty pump.  But the pump is the one style of shoe that KILLS my feet. I think it’s because I have a narrow heel, and they are constantly slipping, even if I buy a narrow width.  And yet the front part of my foot is not narrow; it is quite squarish, in fact.  So if there is any point to the shoe at all, it squeezes my poor pitiful toes.  This does not bode well for the pump.

Every time I watch What Not To Wear and Stacy London puts some poor schmuck in a pump and they say that it is comfortable, I say BAH!

UNTIL my mom, who does not have college to save for or three children to clothe and feed and likes to spoil her loved ones, treated me to a pair of luxury shoes for Christmas.  These sassy ruby red patent leather pumps came from that swanky side of the shoe department that I only look at wistfully as I pass on my way to the budget section in the back of the store.

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And I discovered that there ARE comfortable pumps in the world if your shoe budget rivals the federal deficit. Seriously, I can wear for hours on end without wanting to cut off my foot at the ankle.

And now I’m a believer
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind
I’m in love
I’m a believer…

Oh hi.  Are you still here?  Please pardon the musical interlude.

So yesterday morning I got dressed for church and put on my sassy red shoes and headed out to the car.  On the way we stopped at a convenience store so I could pick up a box of donuts for the food table at church.

I hopped out of the car and as I started across the sidewalk, I stepped my itty-bitty red patent leather-clad heel right smack dab into an over-sized crack in the sidewalk. I kept walking but my shoe did not. It was one of those moments that you immediately look around to see how many people just saw you make a gigantic fool of yourself.

When I went to retrieve my shoe, and I had to give it a healthy yank to dislodge it from the crack.  The good news is the heel did remain attached to the shoe, but the bad news is the heel now looks like this.

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Sorry, Mom.  But this is why I shop in the budget section of the shoe store.