Diary
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More.

Got nothing. So tired. So busy. Can’t keep up with it all.

Got 10 posts budding in my drafts folder, none of which are blossoming at the moment.

Got homework to assist and piano lessons to remember and doctor appointments chauffeur and dinners to prepare.

Got blogs to design and posts to write and children to tend to and laundry piling higher with every passing day.

And yet there’s life going on out there.  I feel self-adsorbed . . . consumed with accomplishing what needs to be accomplished inside these four walls.

And I forget.

I forget about those around me who are struggling.  Sick, jobless, husbandless.  I could do so much.  But I don’t.

There’s always one more post to write . . . one more email to answer . . .  one more tweak to this design or that design . . . one more load of laundry to fold . . .  one more dish to wash . . . one more toy to put away . . . one more child to kiss goodnight.

THIS is my mission field.  I know this.  I take comfort in that.  But there is life beyond these four walls.

I want to do more.

I want to BE more.

Am I REALLY doing the best I can do?

Are any of us?

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23 thoughts on “More.

  1. Oh wow. Yeah. I’m totally there. I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes I’m just so… overwhelmed. It is nice to know that I’m not by myself.

  2. Have you read Radical Homemakers? I’m in the middle of it now and it is rocking my world. The premise is that homemaking is not only ‘ok’ but a very valuable and necessary contribution to society.

    1. Oh I fully believe that, don’t get me wrong. It’s just everything adds up — homemaking, blogging, working, designing, parenting — all together, sometimes it’s just too much.

  3. I love this. And I truly believe that we’re all exactly where we are supposed to be, even if it’s drowning in everyday life. Hope you come up for air soon.

  4. “Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do… but how much love we put in that action. ” -Mother Teresa

    “Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” Mother Teresa

    “If you can’t feed a hundred people, then feed just one. ” Mother Teresa

    “Love begins by taking care of the closest ones – the ones at home. ” Mother Teresa

    Yes, you’re doing your best. The fact that you are asking that question shows that you are at least trying. We are such a results-oriented society that we fail to see that it’s the journey that perfects us…not the products/results of our efforts.

    Do what you can with great love and you are doing your best. 🙂

  5. I understand. It’s why I spend so little time now in cyberspace. And rarely update my own blog anymore either. It was taking too much of the best of me, away from the best people in my life. This year has been one of pruning for me — weeding out a lot of “good” things, so that I can do just a few, important things with the best abilities God has given me.

    1. I often thing I should do some weeding, but then I wind up just taking on five more things to do, lol. And I love it. I love the busy. Usually. Until I hit that wall. 🙂 Thanks for reminding me that it’s okay to step back sometimes.

  6. I’m starting to feel the same sense of overwhelmed-ness! It’s all just too much sometimes. Take a break from this if you need to. There are more important things, for sure. Hugs to you sweet lady!

  7. Thanks for the encouraging comments, yall. I feel better this morning. I just want. to. do. it. all. Ya know? 🙂

    I guess it’s time to make a list. Prioritize. And then take it one thing at a time.

  8. It was all too much for me so I decided 2 weeks ago to stop blogging. Just taking one thing off my plate has led to more time to do the other stuff I do so much better. Little parts of me miss blogging, but I’m loving having more time to talk to people – friends, family, neighbors.

  9. Wow. I’m right there with you. Must be the weather or the moon cycle or something. Yesterday I had to tell my kids I was just cranky about everything and they actually told me to go take a rest. I would have it I thought it would help, but new it wouldn’t at that time. Sometimes the mental overload big and small just comes on. All while my friend has a sudden and grave cancer diagnoses. Yes, someone always has it worse, and we all know our blessings, but we can still feel a little cranky. It just has to pass.

  10. I wonder the same thing everyday. There’s simply not enough time in the day to do it all. I find that scheduling everything – even time to sit and sew something for an hour once a week – helps me get as much done as possible.

  11. Thank you I really needed that post today. It’s nice to see an open honest post about how we moms do so much and how we sometimes wonder if that’s enough. You encouraged me today and you made me feel like I am not alone and for that I thank you.

  12. I saw myself in word you typed out. It was like looking in a mirror. You are not alone, I am not alone. There are so many of us that feel the same way you do. Thank you for this post, it was what I need to read this morning.

  13. Could not agree more. I just read Stephanies’s post (Metropolitan Mama) and realized how we are all tired.

    I am so overwhelmed but dont think I can sacrifice any more sleep

    1. NEVER sacrifice sleep. Seriously. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that the less sleep I get, the harder it is to cope. I went to bed at 9pm the last 2 nights in a row and I’m beginning to feel better.

  14. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
    Just when I thought it could only get easier as my babies get bigger! (4 months & 2 years)
    ; )

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