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This Is How Pathetic I Am

Tonight I had the thrilling experience of going to the dentist for yet three more fillings.  If you’ve been around my blog since the beginning (and I realize that’s not many of you) you may remember my dental saga that has been ongoing since I had children.  I have probably had 20 fillings in the last seven years.  No joke.  Plus one root canal.

Tonight, when I walked into the office, the front desk clerk greeted me by name.  Then the dental assistant popped in from the back and greeted me by name.  Then I ran into the dentist, literally RAN INTO HIM as he was stepping out of the bathroom, and I was going in. 

Talk about awkward.  I mean, I realize that dentists use the potty like the rest of us, but there is something about seeing the man who will be spending the next hour with his hands in the recesses of my mouth coming out of the bathroom that is just a little, well, disconcerting. 

(And yes, he also greeted me by name.)

So as I went into the restroom after exchanging pleasantries with my dentist, my first thought was, "Yay! Blog fodder!"  That, my dear cyberfriends, is how desperate I am for writing material.  If seeing my dentist emerge from the bathroom is considered worthy blog fodder, that surely a sad commentary on the quality of my inspiration of late, is it not?

And I’m not exactly sure where I was going to go with that information.  It’s too late now to make it into an entertaining story, if there even was any potential for such a thing to begin with.  But we’ll never know, now, will we?

So here I am, half of my face numb from the dreaded Novocaine needle that, you may remember, I fear and detest.  And still no blog fodder to speak of.

Until! 

I arrived home at 7:50 to find that Husband had fed and bathed the kids and had them all in bed and was already downstairs working  with a friend on the basement.  Glorious.  That’s what that is.  But that’s not the blog fodder.

So I made haste to the kitchen cabinet that contains the, um, spirits, and began to assemble the necessary ingredients for a chocolate martini, my guilty pleasure many nights after the kids are in bed. 

But when I went to open my martini shaker, it was hopelessly sealed shut.  I tried running it under hot water to loosen the suction, but with no success.

Finally I swallowed my pride and went downstairs to see if Hubs would have better luck with it.  No success. 

So he passed it to his buddy for his turn playing Open The Shaker!  No success. 

Finally the two of them each grabbed an end and pulled with all their might.

No success.

But hey, BLOG FODDER! 

Because really, if you haven’t witnessed your husband and his best friend playing tug of war with your martini shaker, you’re missing out on some highly comical entertainment.

Finally we gave up and decided that a martini stirred, not shaken, while not approved by the martini expert, James Bond, will certainly work in a pinch under my current circumstances.  I’m not picky.  As long as it contains vodka and Godiva liqueur, I’m good to go, no matter how the two substances are combined.

So here I sit, sipping my martini, stirred not shaken, while Hubs slaves away in the basement and the kids are retired in their beds, all ready to peruse some blogs in peace and quiet before I head off to the black hole that is my scrapbooking room.

This is the life!

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34 thoughts on “This Is How Pathetic I Am

  1. And did I mention the shower cap on my head with the olive oil treatment beneath? Oh, I’m a charmer. 😉

  2. I know you’re numb and not excited about having been at the dentist, but to arrive home before 8pm, Hubby puts the kids to bed, and you have a cocktail in your hand? You can’t beat it! Hope you have a great night!

  3. The end of the evening sounds very nice! I have had a very wuiet evineing around here myself and am looking for my dear hubby to come down so we can much on a chocolate surprise he brought me and go to bed EARLY! Nights like this don’t happen often but I am soooo thankful when they do!

  4. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  5. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  6. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  7. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  8. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  9. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  10. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  11. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  12. Oh I LOVE Chocolater martinis, never knew how to make one at home though, thanks. Do you add a Chocolote Kiss in the bottom? If you do not you should try it. It soaks up the vodka and when you let it melt in your mouth at the end it is like another Chocolote martini all over again. That is the stuff.

  13. Teehee! Yall are a’crackin’ me up. I hope people are reading the comments. They’re funnier than the post.

    For the record: There is nothing running down my chin, although it does make for a good story. I wish I’d thought of it. 😉 Fortunately they numbed only the top two quadrants, so drinking something isn’t too difficult.

    And Shannon, the main difference is the temperature. I can’t get it cold enough by stirring it. But yes, the ingredients certainly mix well enough with a spoon. 🙂

  14. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  15. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  16. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  17. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  18. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  19. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  20. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  21. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  22. Oh my gosh that sounds AWESOME! I mean, the kids in bed, chocolate martini part. Not the fillings and the dentist-in-the-potty-part. 🙂

  23. Charlotte – I can’t recommend BlogHerAds highly enough. Nothing part-time would support my shopping habit 😉 but if you are interested in ads, BlogHer is an excellent way to go. They are now accepting new applicants, so go for it!

  24. the bathroom/dentist part sounds like a Seinfeld episode. 🙂
    I agree it would creep me out a little too, maybe they should have a private bathroom in the back for the help.

    I am also extremely dentalphobic, I would rather have a pap smear anyday, they are much quicker. 🙂

    Have a good day.

    One more question? Does having ads on your blog pay off financially? does it support your shopping habit? I am wondering if I should look into it.

  25. I’ve seen my ob-gyn doctor TWICE in public. Once at Target (in “regular” clothes) and once at my favorite bookstore (in scrubs).

    Both times I ran and felt sort of icky. It’s just not right! He’s only supposed to be in the office or the hospital, right?

    🙂

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