I get so many comments from women in their pre- and postmenopausal years expressing frustration with body changes. Even without significant weight gain, weight gets redistributed, certain areas feel a little fluffier, and there’s often a new sensitivity to fabrics, seams, and waistbands.
Just the other day, I reached for a favorite pair of jeans and they just… didn’t fit right. The waistband felt tight and uncomfortable, and once I finally got them zipped, I realized they’d created the dreaded muffin top. I immediately wanted to change into sweatpants and call it a day.
If this sounds familiar, you aren’t imagining things. These shifts are incredibly common during perimenopause and post-menopause, and they can make getting dressed feel far more complicated than it used to. But the good news is that a few thoughtful adjustments to fabric, fit, and silhouette can make a big difference.
You don’t need to give up structure or polish — you just need to choose pieces that work with your body as it is right now. And most importantly, give yourself some grace. This isn’t a failure on your part; it’s a natural part of the hormonal shifts we all experience.
When Your Body Changes the Rules: Dressing for Midlife and Beyond
With that in mind, here are a few tips I’ve picked up that have made getting dressed during this season feel easier and more comfortable.
1. Start With The Right Fabrics
Fabric suddenly matters a lot. Pieces that used to feel fine can start to feel heavy, scratchy, or too warm. When that happens, it’s often the material, not the cut, that’s the issue.
Frank & Eileen linen shirt // Frank & Eileen wide leg jeans // Sam Edelman rattan slides // Dragon Diffusion tote
I tend to gravitate toward natural fibers that breathe and move with you, like cotton, linen, cashmere, and Tencel. These fabrics generally feel softer against the skin and regulate temperature better than synthetic fabrics, which makes a noticeable difference if you’re feeling more sensitive to heat or texture. If something traps warmth or feels clingy, it’s probably not going to get a lot of wear.
I’ve found that spending a little more on natural, breathable fabrics often means I reach for those pieces far more often, and they end up being better value in the long run.
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2. Choose Waistlines That Work With You
Fit can start to feel different over time, especially around the midsection, and that’s often where clothes become uncomfortable first.
EVEREVE Dakota Plaid Wool Jacket (S) // LOFT scoop neck tee (M) // FRAME Le Slim Palazzo in Starship (30) (budget option) // similar boot // Freja Hudson
For me, I still prefer structure over fully elastic waistbands, but I’ve learned that a little stretch goes a long way. I also prefer clean, flat fronts rather than pleats or gathered waists, which can add volume in the last place I need it.
Rise plays a big role here as well. Personally, I find that a slightly higher rise is more comfortable than a mid-rise, because it distributes pressure more evenly instead of cutting straight across the fluffiest part of my mid-section.
Mid-rise styles can work beautifully on longer torsos or flatter midsections, but if they suddenly feel restrictive, trying a higher rise may surprise you with how much better it feels.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE: Mid-Rise vs. High-Waisted Jeans: Which Rise Is Right For You?
3. Light Layers Make Life Easier
Temperature swings are real, and bulky layers often make them worse. Instead of heavier pieces, lighter layers that are easy to add or remove tend to be much more comfortable and flexible as the day goes on.
EVEREVE Camp Jacket // Nora Tee // MOTHER Insider // VEJA Esplar // Naghedi Hobo
Lightweight cardigans, soft blazers with stretch, utility jackets in breathable fabrics, and silky wraps that don’t add bulk are all great options. Having an easy third layer on hand gives you flexibility without feeling over-bundled or weighed down.
4. Choose Silhouettes That Skim, Not Cling
If you used to enjoy more form-fitting tops or stretchy fabrics, you may find they’re not working as well for you these days. When the styles we once loved start to feel uncomfortable, it’s easy to overcorrect and reach for overly oversized pieces, but too much volume can add bulk and visual weight we don’t want.
cloth + stone square neck tank // MOTHER Weekender // Schutz sandals // similar earrings
Sometimes the simplest fix is just sizing up, especially in sweaters and tops. Going up one size often gives you a bit more ease through the body without changing the overall silhouette or making things look sloppy.
It also helps to look for silhouettes and fabrics that skim the body or offer soft structure. The goal isn’t to hide your shape, but to choose pieces that follow your curves without grabbing onto them.
Woven fabrics often do this best, since they hold their shape rather than hugging every line. Some structured knits can work well too — especially heavier ribbed styles or ponte. Details like darts, bias-cut skirts, and tailored jackets also help create shape without feeling restrictive.
5. Don’t Overlook What’s Underneath
Sometimes the discomfort we feel in our clothes isn’t the clothes at all — it’s what’s underneath them. A bra that’s lost its elasticity or seams that suddenly feel irritating can throw off an entire outfit.
Refreshing a few foundation pieces can make a noticeable difference. Look for supportive bras that don’t feel restrictive, seamless underwear, and smoothing tanks or camis. When the base layer feels good, everything layered on top tends to sit better and feel more comfortable throughout the day.
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6. Tap Into the Magic of the “Third Piece”
When I’m feeling a little self-conscious about my middle, I almost always reach for a “third piece.” A utility jacket, leather bomber, an open cardigan, or even a longer wool coat instantly makes an outfit feel more pulled together.
Worn open, that extra layer creates two long vertical lines down the front of the body, which helps elongate your frame and draws the eye away from the midsection. This works especially well with a monochromatic outfit underneath, because it creates a clean column of color. (The look above is a good example of that; you can also do this with a jacket you will keep on indoors.)
This is one of the easiest ways to achieve an elevated casual look while still feeling comfortable and covered.
7. Add a Mood-Boosting Element
Even with all of the tips above, there are days when we have to make peace with the fact that our bodies don’t look exactly the way they did before perimenopause entered the picture. On those days, I do the best I can with fit and fabric, and then I shift my focus.
Harper Matte Coated Tee (M) // MOTHER Outsider Sneak (30) // Dolce Vita Roslyn Flats (8.5) // Tom Ford sunnies (budget option) // Jenny Bird Florence Earrings
A great handbag, a bold pendant, chic sunglasses, a statement shoe, a pretty scarf worn close to your face, or even a fresh swipe of lip color can instantly lift an outfit. Not only do these details pull the look together, they also give your eye (and everyone else’s) something else to focus on.
Sometimes it’s the smallest detail that changes how you feel, and that confidence shift is often the most powerful style tool of all.
The Bottom Line
Style doesn’t stop at any age or stage. It just evolves. If your wardrobe feels different lately, it’s not a loss of style or a failure to keep up. It’s a subtle nudge to start dressing the body you have now, with clothes that support you instead of fighting against change.
Jenni Kayne Flynn in Oatmeal (S) (similar for less) // AGOLDE Harper (29) (similar for less) // similar boots // Tom Ford sunnies (option) // Jane Win pendant // Jenny Bird Florence Earrings
Focusing on smart fabrics, thoughtful fit, supportive foundations, and the right finishing touches can make a world of difference in how your clothes feel — and how you feel wearing them.
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46 Responses
Thank you for this post! I have always been slim and suddenly nothing fits or looks right specially in my lower abdomen! Not amount of exercise will make it go away even though I eat clean. It can be very frustrating and makes it really hard to get dressed and feel good about the outfits that once looked great and now not so much.
Thank you so much for this post. It feels so good to know we are all not alone in this struggle. The struggle is REAL. It’s so frustrating but knowing there’s a lot of women going thru it helps. And you make finding all the things so much easier. So thanks again for keeping it real 🥰
Thank you so much for this post!!
Thank you for this timely post that so many of us are encountering in mid life. I agree whole heartedly on the importance of needing to give ourself grace, give ourselves permission to size up in clothes and to focus on our health and well being rather than a clothing size or number on the scale. It’s not an easy concept to accept. I enjoyed reading the post.
Love the practical suggestions for a new reality that I am begrudgingly trying to accept. Thank you for this post!
You look amazing! Thank you for doing what you do!!! Your post was very helpful to me….I think I’m 5 years ahead of you as far as the menopausal wardrobe challenges so it made me nod and smile… Yes, yes, yes! So relatable!
Great post!….Thank you! Pulls all the ideas together and is very relatable….
This is such a well written and thoughtful piece. Thank you.
Have you ever tried Democracy jeans? They carry them at Dillards and TJ Maxx here. They have elastic on the inside of the waistband but the outside looks like a regular waistband. They have a little extra give. And the cost is reasonable. I love them and they fit great in my older years! I also do cryotherapy on my midsection to help keep my waistline in check. No side effects.
No, but I’ve tried Wit & Wisdom, they’re owned by the same company, I believe. I do like that waistband elastic.
Thank you for this post! My favorite pair of jeans no longer feel good and I was getting frustrated! It is good to know I am not the only one going through all of the weight shifting around. Please keep doing what you are doing because by you “keeping it real” the rest of us know that we are not alone. Thank you for the helpful hints….love those.
“And most importantly, give yourself some grace.” Oh my goodness, 100%!!! Been rebuilding my wardrobe over the last couple years to accommodate all these changes, incorporating a lot of what you’ve mentioned. I agree, it helps to work with our changing bodies, not fighting them or wishing to be back to our 20-or-30-something selves.
Thank you for being so real here. All of this is so true and I’ve had to adjust doing these….. especially lighter layers. I’m in full blown menopause at age 64….. yes 64, as I weined off estrogen I’ve been on for years after an early hysterectomy. My migraines were so bad it was in an attempt to stop those. It’s taken 8 yrs to wein off and I’m having head pain daily and menopause symptoms are terrible. Not sure next step. Still on progesterone. I first fought my body bad, but it’s starting to level out more like I was. But….. I’ve found I’ve had to make the tweaks above to feel comfortable and confident. I always say to my friends…..”wasn’t going through labor enough?” lol Hang in there. You’ve nailed it for dressing your body now. You look great. I almost ordered that light grey coat from Evereve but ended up ordering the navy denim one. Forgot the name. It’s denim and then navy sweater type fabric too. I hope I like it. Thought it would be a fun third piece.
Thank you for this post. It is very fitting for me now. I noticed the last year how much I started to struggle getting dressed and feeling good about it. I purchased so many new clothes the last 2 years trying to figure out how to make it work with my body. What used to work, doesn’t anymore. Thank you for the insight you provided.
Me too. I purchase things and send them right back. Giving myself grace is hard. I look in the mirror and wonder who is that?? But I’m in there somewhere and I need to be kind to her.
Don’t know what happened. My post I wrote didn’t post. Long story short…. AMEN to all of this. I have to do all of this. You are looking great dressing your body and I appreciate you posting this. Bottom line we all go through it. I told my girl friend the other day….”wasn’t going through labor enough?” lol
Thank you for your kind, thoughtful and educated advice on how to make this challenging time of life better! I have been in full-menopause for about 7 years now, but have just now started getting a LOT of belly fat – it’s embarrassing! It was a good reminder to give my body grace, and that hopefully this is just a passing season. Unfortunately I’ve invested a lot of good money in quality clothing that is no longer fitting me the way it did. That is perhaps what I mourn the most. I think I need to focus on different fabrics (other than denim!) for a while, and then go back. Thank you again!
Thanks for this post. I am going through all these things and it is nice to feel like I’m not alone. Frustrating after a lifetime of being active and eating clean. Hard to adjust to my evolving body.
After a year of frustration and fighting with my clothes I decided to go up a size in pants to avoid the muffin top and in my tops too. a little extra wiggle room made all the difference in how I felt and looked. Your discussion on this matter makes me feel better about it because now I know it’s not just me.
I loved this post! I am happy with my weight and yet, there are days a pair of jeans suddenly feels tight at the waist, yet no movement to back this up on the scale. Or, tops just don’t look right anymore. The shift in body composition is real! I love that you address this. I am a young looking 60 year old and don’t want to give in to the frump! I 100% have to remind myself daily that I am not supposed to look 30 or 40 anymore! But I can look chic, modern, classic and FUN! Those are my words going forward into this season of life. And then focus on improving your mind, your creative side, your wisdom and look forward to this new stage! My new goal is to become that older woman that people say, “wow, I want to age like that!”.
Agree 100% with you! Jill. I don’t get why things are suddenly tight without a weight shift. Frustrating!
I have only found you a couple of months ago but truly appreciate your tips and tricks, and seeing some new ways to pair outfits, which is always a challenge for me. So happy to have found you!
I feel like crying. I needed this! Thank you!
Great article! I want to mention that when I started having frequent hot flashes I found pullovers to be problematic. They would mess up my hair and were inconvenient if I had to take things on and off frequently. I started gravitating to tops that had a full zipper so I can open them up for air flow or take them off very quickly. Glad that is mostly over!!
What a well-thought-out, positive post. Thank you, Jo-Lynne.
Hi
This article is on point and a reminder to be kind to ourselves. I am a bit older than you but this year I suddenly have what I call midriff bulge. It makes me so upset with that body change. So now I have a bulge and a slimmer leg and rear area. Still have large breast but they hang closer to my waist. lol. I’m a work in progress learning to accept.
Thanks for this post. Such a frustrating season of life! I find myself saying goodbye to some of my favorite pieces because they simply do not work on this body anymore. It makes me sad, but slowly I am finding pieces that make me feel better about the body I now have. Thanks for sharing your struggles and your encouragement.
Yes, to all this! I never wear a sweater without something underneath that I can strip down to at a moment’s notice. The hot flashes can strike when I least expect them!
I was fortunate that I didn’t gain weight through perimenopause but that doesn’t mean things look the same – basically, my 55 year-old body is losing its structural integrity, so I prioritize wearing well-cut garments, in good fabrics, to keep up the appearance of strength. Drapey tees and pants in cheap, stretch fabric make me look at feel deflated.
I feel the same as Angelica! I agree with all she said and also the fact that there seems to be very little choices for women in their peri or post menopause era! So disappointed when I try to shop for clothes that aren’t for young girls or for elderly women. I try to make the clothes I have work, and most times they do not!
Thank you for this! I’ve noticed a lot this past year how some articles of clothing are itchy or just uncomfortable when they weren’t before. I have also been leaning into the better fabrics lately and it has made a difference! Thanks for all the great tips.
Very good advice. I’ve been through it and experienced it. I remember wearing low rise before menopause. Then suddenly those pants gave me muffin top. Higher rise does work for me better now. My weight does fluctuate if I watch sugar intake. Now some of my jeans are lose since I’ve lost weight. I’ve decided I’m keeping the bigger ones incase I gain weight again. However, I am serious about sugar intake because I don’t want to get diabetes. So now I’m going to buy a couple of jeans in a smaller size. I already had donated my smaller size jeans that didn’t fit when I gained weight last year. Such a hassle.
Thank you so much for this post! The peri- and post-menopause changes are frustrating This life chapter that has so many positives – children grown and independent, no ‘responsibilities’ related to children’s activities, more free time. However, trying to fight the frump makes getting dressed more and more challenging I appreciate the tips and encouragement in this article so much!
Thanks for these tips and this reminder. I have also been struggling lately. I’ve always bought curvy styles because I have issues with gapping at the waist. All of a sudden (three years in menopause) all these pants are tight, I feel bloated and so uncomfortable. I haven’t changed my eating or exercising. Regular styles still gap so I’m sort of in between. I had a nice collection of jeans and pants I loved and now they don’t fit. Like you, I don’t love elastic waist pants but some days that’s all I want to wear and I don’t have the budget to buy all new pants. I can’t imagine having a collection of premium denim that doesn’t fit. Ugh!
I just commented but wanted to add.. for the record Jo Lynne you always look fabulous!
Thank you so much. xo
Good post with ideas–my only complaint is so many of the cute items that caught my eye are sold out—and probably have been for awhile. I am past menopause now–but honestly, I didn’t see big changes. But I would say the most important thing is finding a form of exercise that hits all the spots and that you enjoy. I think going to Jazzercise has kept my body in check and kept my arms from the flabbing. 30 minutes aerobics, then weights, then floor work–seems to hit the areas for me–in one hour I feel I’ve worked out everything! Some jewelry pieces that are everyday pieces that make you feel good when you look at them and a good color lipstick for you will help with almost any outfit!
I so agree with you about lipstick (and a smile!!)
Great post Jo-Lynne! I try not get discouraged when my clothes don’t fit like before or a style just looks “off”. You gave me some great tips to adjust. I like using accessories like a long oblong scarf or a longer necklace or wearing more V-neck tops to make an outfit shine. I need to let my style “evolve”! I really didn’t struggle with body changes until my 60’s, and then the COVID years made things worse. Settling in with Intermittent fasting has been my most important health adjustment over the past 5 years. Be confident and wear a smile!! Now, off to the hairdresser for a fresh cut, that always makes me smile!
Thanks for the pep talk. 🙂
SPOT ON and so well-said! Thanks for the great examples and the great advice. You are an inspiration!! Thanks for normalizing the changes and removing the shame. I don’t look like I did at 40. But that’s okay: I can still look great! YOU prove it.
Thanks, Linda!
I see white jeans showing up in this post and the Evereve post. Will you be doing an updated white jeans post this year? Are they still okay to keep in the rotation?
I plan to keep wearing them! I’ll see about updating my white denim post once I start wearing them a bit more. I do think flowy pants are more modern looking, but I don’t see white jeans going anywhere… maybe I am just biased b/c I love them. We’ll see!
Yes, to all of this! I never wear a sweater without something underneath that I can strip down to at a moment’s notice. The hot flashes can strike when I least expect them!
Knowing one’s ideal pant rise is a game changer. Too low of a rise will give me muffin top and too high of a rise will throw off my proportions. 10.5” – 11.25” is my sweet spot in fitted cuts, and no matter what the trend may be, I plan to stick to that.
I was fortunate that I didn’t gain weight through perimenopause but that doesn’t mean things look the same – basically, my 55 year-old body is losing its structural integrity, so I prioritize wearing well-cut garments, in good fabrics to maintain a robust appearance. Drapey tees and pants in cheap, stretch fabric make me look and feel deflated.
I wasn’t seeing my comment until I reposted one 5 days later and only then did I see the ones from everyone else, with the exception of Angelica’s. Hmm…
We were having caching issues, I think it is fixed now! 🙂 LMK if it happens again.