I Think I’ll Plan To Be Sick Next Year

Thanks for all your kind comments on our going-out photo!  We were on our way to my husband’s company holiday party.  I would like to know who, exactly, enjoys these things?

The employees have to put up with each other day in and day out.  What do they want with spending their Saturday night together?  And then the poor spouses — we just sit around, smiling politely, trying not to look bored, and in my case trying not to fall asleep after two glasses of red wine on top of the Tylenol Cold tablets I took before we left the house.

And if your husband is like mine and has no sense of urgency or strategy about reserving a place at a table, you end up spending dinner with the mish-mash of people who were all left sitting at the last empty table in the room because they have no urgency or strategy either, or because they don’t have any friends.  Oh yeah, good times.

And did I mention how COLD it was in there?  I was prepared for this.  Last year I spent this event huddled under my husband’s sport coat, so this year I was determined to go prepared.  But in my typical fashion, I THOUGHT about going to the mall and buying some sort of wrap to wear, but I never actually got around to doing it.  Instead, I spent all day Saturday calling around to friends and neighbors, trying to bum something off of them.  Which fortunately I was able to do, thus saving myself both a trip to the mall and the $30 I would have inevitably spent on such a thing.  And as a result, no one even saw my cute burgundy top because I was wrapped in a black sequinny scarf the whole night.  Yes, I KNOW it’s not a word, but it should be.

Any-WHO.  The food was good, so that redeemed the night somewhat.  And we were sent home with a box of gourmet chocolate-covered pretzels that we ripped into on our way home.  So all was not lost.  But I’m definitely contemplating a year off.  In ten years, I have only missed one holiday party, so I think I’ve paid my dues.

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25 Responses

  1. Oh yes, the office party. I hated them with every inch of my body. I may have many internet buddies but in real life….mingling with people I don’t know is not high on my list of things I want to do. Let alone spending a night away from girls with strangers – just not my idea of fun. You are a good wife, and it is OK to take a year off. Just don’t bring any bad karma your way and start planning a sick out now because I actually think being sick would be worse than going to the party!

  2. My firm cancelled the holiday parties this year. I can’t say that I was disappointed. I’d much rather spend a Saturday night at home with the baby!

  3. I hate the office parties. We have a banquet each year, and it is like pulling teeth. I hate them. I go, smile and say all the right things but it is painful!!

    A year off it definitly ok, you have earned it!

  4. Not a big fan of holiday parties either – you spend enough time with coworkers during the week why subject yourself to an evening? My husband’s office did away with the holiday party and do a luncheon during the work day instead. Smart move but my husband still thinks it should be eliminated all together. He’s also the guy who suggested they stop cakes for every single person’s birthday. It was getting to be like that Seinfeld episode where there was a birthday almost twice a month. Remember Elaine got hooked on sheet cake?. So now they just do one big celebration during the year. He really is a nice guy…promise!

  5. Your experience is why we’ve decided to skip this year’s party. (And the fact that we figured it would cost us a small fortune between a new outfit, parking, a babysitter, etc.) We’re planning to go away for a night away instead! I say skipping next year is definitely in order.

  6. I agree about with you about not enjoying work parties! When my husband changed jobs in September and I found out that they don’t have Christmas parties at his new work (he works for a city and apparently they don’t feel right using tax payers dollars to throw a party) I did the happy dance because I was dreading going to his previous job’s Christmas party. At least you looked good and got a parting gift :).

  7. I LOVE Christmas and all it entails, but I am soooo bah humbug about office and adult only parties. I want to be home snuggled on the couch with my family or watching Christmas movies or making cookies…….NOT socializing with people my husband sees at work on a DAILY basis or with people I see all the time. Not to mention the $$ you spend on an outfit for dressing up that will hardly be worn again…..that is $$ I would rather spend on a nice pair of jeans or something FUN.

  8. The last time I went to my husband’s holiday party…I was about 8 months pregnant, couldn’t stop eating all of the fantastic food. I even dropped some right down the front of my pink dupioni dress. Lovely. And I couldn’t drink the wine, because I was pregnant, and they didn’t have enough chairs to seat 1/10th of the people attending…so the big pink sober pregnant lady with the swollen ankles didn’t have that much fun. And it was freezing. And my face ached with all the fake smiling I had to do.

    Why do they bother, I wonder? Just give everyone a day off, or a bonus check or something.

  9. At least the most important people (us) got to see how good you looked! My husbands company dosen’t even include spouses in office Christmas party functions – cool, huh!? I don’t even have to act like I care to go! The kids and I just have cereal or a sandwich, so I don’t have to cook that night either – I like office Christmas functions:)

  10. Okay, the worse are the parties you have to attend and they don’t invite your spouse! Hated those! And, yes I agree with you, I do not like company parties! You looked beautiful!

  11. Oh, yes the seating strategy! Men just don’t understand this concept! Right when you walk in, you scout out the room to try to sit at a table with people you actually want to talk to. If you don’t do it quick, you’ll get stuck with the guy who tries to recruit you for Amway all night!

  12. Seems to me that many companies could forgo the parties and just give bonuses with the money they spend! I mean seriously! $50 dollar gift cards can buy some family time and that is so much more important than the office party! Maybe you should blog about that, make it public, say it loud and be heard! You might start something!


  13. Funny thing is, I used to LOVE the office parties. I loved that my husband’s company did something nice for the employees and their spouses and that I had a reason to get dressed up and go out. So I hate to look a gift horse in the mouth, kwim? It really is a nice party. I think we just need to be more proactive about finding fun people to socialize with?? And turn up the heat, for crying in a bucket!!

  14. People that don’t go to a lot of these things don’t realize how much work they are. They think ‘yea a party’ but it’s not that easy, it is work to make small talk to people that you don’t know or ever care to know. Also if you are the bosses wife you walk in and everyone gives you the once over and you know they are thinking, ‘boy has she gained weight!” Bah Humbug! haha!

  15. Fortunately hubby has some good friends at work. We actually get together outside of work on occasion.
    For the holiday party,we make plans to grab a table so we can all be together and its a great time to catch up. The food is amazing and free!
    Its sad that so few people enjoy the parties. I think they really are given as a kind gesture or at least that’s what I imagine.

  16. So we have one to go this Friday and Husband doesn’t even know most of the people since this is a new job and a part-time one at that. I’m trying to be excited about going out (it is business casual, so I can make do with what’s in my closet) and eating good food, but I know I’ll end up feeling like I have nothing to talk about. And I just can’t wait for the comments on my family size. Yeah, right.

  17. What an excellent synopsis of workplace holiday parties! I especially agree with this part: “The employees have to put up with each other day in and day out. What do they want with spending their Saturday night together?”

    I always wonder why employers feel the need to host a party…at the busiest time of the year. Here’s an idea: they could save the money spent on planning the party and just give everyone an extra bonus instead? 🙂

  18. You guys look gorgeous!! My company party is lame and so is Matt’s, but we do get to partake in a fancy dinner and go see the color purple for a broker event this year. YAY. I Love your outfit…I might copy the look!!!!!

  19. I love your outfit.. the color looks great on you!!! I am thankful that my husbands company does not do the company “Holiday” party anymore.. though I miss buying the new shiny clothes!! 🙂

  20. We have any every-other-year policy for these types of events. We just can’t deal with the awkward social interaction each and every holiday season. We are expecting a new baby any day now so that has successfully gotten us out of a lot of not-so-fun social commitments.

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